Dear readers, I assume that all of you have been in a relationship. Or something close to it. Well, at least you know the butterflies in the stomach feeling, right?
Love is great and empowering and the leading force in life. You can love your jeans that have lost all shape and colour but you obstinately refuse to throw out or simply a well-written song. And of course, there is love for another person.
Let’s say you and your significant other have been together for a while. And everything’s going fine, besides a few fights every now and then to shake off the dust from an otherwise tranquil relationship. Take time to remember the smooth change of vocabulary that comes along as a bonus to the bond you share. When does ’I’ become ’we’?
There’s isn’t anything that distraughtful in starting to speak about yourself in the first person with switching the ’I’ to ’we’. Buddism laid aside, where losing ego is a virtue, I live in a Western culture and I want my damn ego back!
I have fallen in a trap of changing terms as my relationship is getting closer to a 1,5-year signpost. At some point, whenever I was refering to something I did myself, I began to use ’we’. No, ’we’ didn’t do the laundry and no, ’we’ didn’t get that damn dinner cooked. And still, I trip over the same misuse of pronouns. This is especially annoying when it occurs while talking to other people, couple-ish or not, making us two sounds like a couple that has passed their silver wedding.
Why does it bother me so much? The truth is, countless lovey-dovey moments later, I refuse to fuse. I am not a hermaphrodite, having one heartbeat but different minds, trapped in a single body. I am serious, he is easy-going, I like to read books, he barely touches them. He’s an owl, ready to party all night and sleep all day, while I’m wide awake 7 in the morning and deadtired at 11pm.
My brain knows the attitude towards ’we-ism’, yet my tongue is slow to learn the difference.